The things they say . . .

"Until 1933, no Rolls-Royce was equipped with reverse gear. Sir Henry Royce was unwilling to have his car adopt what he regarded as an undignified mode of progression" and "On the exceedingly rare occasions when an Owner has occasion to raise the bonnet of any post-war Rolls-Royce, he hears a discreetly modulated rendering of 'Land of Hope and Glory' played by the BBC Symphony Orchestra", and again, "The rear arm-rests in the Silver Spirit are edible". — All this, and much more, from a full-page advertisement in The Times dated March 31st., 1983. From which it would appear that the Company's new Masters think that Rolls-Royce is just a joke. They go on to remark that "There are no Rolls-Royce motor cars in Ulan Bator", which makes one wonder if there will be any sales anywhere else, if Crewe goes on in this vein . . ! One hopes, too, that the R-R EC and other historical sources will not waste much time over the Company's recent statement that "Henry Royce's real name was Henry Runnicles. The Company was called Rolls-Runnicles for the first three months of its life until, after constant pressure from Charles Rolls, Runnicles changed his name to the more euphonious Royce" or try to check on their story that "Henry Royce once came upon a young mechanic using a steel ruler to check the dimensions of a radiator . . . Royce battered the unfortunate youth to death with the implement. To this day, the Company still pays a pension to his family".

You see what we mean by the thing being something of a joke, and too comical for further comment. — W.B.