Breathe in and reeelaaax… Time to head back into the primal-screaming MotoGP paddock, where Machiavelli would find the going tough and where trophy girlfriends paddle ankle deep in testosterone as they prowl from pit lane to VIP hospitality suite. But we’re giving all that a wide berth today. Instead we’re wandering along the millionaire’s row of motorhomes at Mugello, looking for some nice people to hang out with.

They do exist in MotoGP, believe me, and the good guy count has blown up this year, thanks to the arrival of three new riders: Troy Bayliss, Colin Edwards and Nicky Hayden. These three former superbike stars are the total opposite of the biggest ‘stronzo’ (Italian for something we shouldn’t mention here) on the MotoGP grid, who I won’t name. Oh, okay, I’ll give you a clue, he wears a goatee.

I mean, Bayliss, Edwards and Hayden actually treat people like me as fellow human beings, rather than some kind of untouchables.

Bayliss is a genuinely normal bloke with a very abnormal talent for thrashing a motorcycle half to death.

Anyway, let’s kick things off by knocking on the door of the Bayliss motorhome. Inside the Aussie’s wagon it’s kiddie chaos – kids Mitchell and Abbey are larking around with Jeremy McWilliams’ two boys and some other random paddock urchins. “Hey Mitchell, it’s a disaster in here, can you tidy up some of those Gameboy things,” pleads Bayliss, quite reasonably, considering this is only minutes after he’s dumped his Desmosedici out of sixth place in the Italian GP.

Bayliss is super cool. He’s got fewer airs and graces than the paddock toilet attendant – a genuinely normal bloke with a very abnormal talent for thrashing a motorcycle half to death. But boy can he be intense, with big burning eyes just like Mick Doohan’s. In fact that’s Bayliss – he’s Micky D with a big cheesy grin. Most of the time.

At the 2003 German GP Bayliss went skinhead purely to cheer up a pissed-off Ducati cook who’d had his head shaved, against his will, by fellow team members. His rock-solid attitude may have something to do with the fact that he understands the realities of life – he spray painted motors for a living until his late twenties. Of course, he’s got his quirks, like he gets a bit dark when things aren’t going right and he’s one of those riders who hates talking about bike set-up, because he’s paranoid about his rivals discovering his secrets.

Tech chats with Bayliss tend to go like this: “Troy, what have you been working on?” “The bike, mate.” “What areas exactly?” “All of it.” “Front or rear?” “Ah Jeez, the front.” “Suspension, tyres, what?” “Ah, just the whole front, mate.”

When it comes to talking about his motorcycle, Edwards is the opposite. He’s happy to get involved in deep technical chats, while wife Alyssia changes baby Gracie’s nappies on the next couch in their motorhome. And no one knows how to get their point across better. This is how he describes what it’s like to ride his Aprilia MotoGP bike, “You take a bull, you cut off its balls, you dangle them in front of its face, then you climb on its back”.