Verstappen even bends time (probably) – Up/down at Zandvoort

The big plastic Rolex clock which adorns the pit exit at Zandvoort was doing strange things at the 2023 Dutch Grand Prix.

As Karun Chandhok pointed out on the Sky broadcast just a few laps into the race, time was behaving in a slightly odd way – so much had happened, but we were only on lap three. Was all the action happening really fast, or were those quivering comedy hands on the oversized time timepiece just moving really slowly?

With the North Sea storms blowing in and out, and entirely new race strategies conceived and then junked in a matter of moments, the sense of F1 anguish emanating from the pit wall’s collective furrowed brow became almost palpable as teams tried to live with a race in constant flux.

It almost goes without saying though, there was of course one constant.

One man who could do an extra long tour of the time/space continuum in all its iterations and still have the gap for an extra fastest lap pitstop is still Max Verstappen, a man impervious to even Albert Einstein’s wildest theories.

Here’s what was going up, down, round and maybe even through the dunes at the Dutch race.

Goin’ Down

Inter-mix-up

OK, one entry in and we admit there is actually something else resistant to even Cern’s most potent experiments – Ferrari’s pit strategy.

In a fine tribute to its 1999 European GP mix-up when the crew comedically mislaid Eddie Irvine’s new set of Bridgestones, just about making sure his unlikely title challenge would remain exactly that, at Zandvoort 2023 Charles Leclerc came in on lap 2 looking for a razor-sharp reaction to the changing conditions.

The Monegasque had clearly forgotten he was driving for Ferrari, who don’t bother with such things. Couldn’t he remember the normal protocol was to respond to the ‘Question – Plan D [for dessert]?’ message, drive round for three more laps prevaricating, get in the way of team-mate Carlos Sainz for a bit on one of his rare good days, and then come in?

After so many years at the Scuderia, you think Charles would have gotten with il plan by now.

Charles Leclerc and Carlos Sainz next week in Monza pic.twitter.com/TDUC4dSjAU

— Mahir 🇹🇷🇬🇧 (@ScrewderiaF1) August 27, 2023

Perez put out to dry

Another man mystifyingly not au fait with his team’s modus operandi was Sergio Perez. The Mexican had brilliantly risen to the front by changing to inters on lap 2, but was then demoted back down when Red Bull decided apropos of nothing to give Verstappen the undercut, which of course he executed with typically devastating effect.

“Did Max undercut us?” a slightly indignant Checo asked on the radio. Obviously, mate.

Yank feels the strain

By getting into Q3 Logan Sargeant snared the best qualifying position for an American driver since F1 legend Michael Andretti in 1993.

The Williams man celebrated by binning his FW45 in the final segment, then just to make double sure the Zandvoort TECPRO was up to scratch, did it again in the race – though the latter occasion may have been down to a mechanical gremlin.

You did feel for the distraught Floridian as he slumped on the bank next to the track, another disastrous race in a trying season.

Ricciardo Renaissance on hold

You would have thought it was F1’s greatest comeback such has been the nauseating social media output, but the Ricciardo Renaissance has lasted two races after the poor guy broke his hand in practice.

Here’s hoping the auld Badger can get some points on the board on his next, err, comeback in Singapore.

Goin’ Up

Pulling the strings

Bizarre, bombastic and arguably in bad taste – but strangely watchable. Not Lewis Hamilton’s trousers, but Andre Rieu’s pre-race Zandvoort show.

Laying down the Lawson

AlphaTauri’s supersub Liam Lawson understandably didn’t repeat his usual feat of winning on debut in almost every category he races in, but Ricciardo’s antipodean replacement didn’t do too badly at all in Zandvoort, coming home 13th ahead of team-mate Yuki Tsunoda.

Long game

Albon was once again a brilliant tyre-whisper in Zandvoort, coaxing his Grove machine to eighth –  a car which looks to have the aerodynamic sophistication of a ham sandwich.

Gassed

Chapeau to Pierre Gasly, dragging apparently F1’s most chaotic team to its second podium of the year.